Even Me - Principle Two

Day 2 - 2 Nephi 4:19 " And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted."

"Nephi, a prophet of God, humbly admits to God the he is harassed by temptation and sin.  Why do you think God wanted him to record this and then allowed it to be preserved and handed down to us?  Who is it that has strengthened Nephi?  Who has he learned to trust?  What do you think it is that he trusts the Lord can do for him?  Can you trust that the Lord has enough mercy and power to redeem even you? Why?"

I still remember how poignant this self-discovery process was for me.  I believed in Christ, but somehow, sub-consciously, believed I wasn't good enough for His attention, for His notice, for His complete atoning sacrifice.  Somehow I fell short of whatever invisible bar there was to be redeemed, all the way redeemed.  We all carry around the story that we're broken, damaged goods.  We got that message somewhere along the way when we were young and I have carried it around for a long time.  Now I know that I'm flawed because the very nature of being mortal is automatically flawed.  I'm here to overcome it, tackle it, face it, beat it.  But having to do so does not disqualify me, it's supposed to be that way.  It's how I respond to challenges that matters, not that they happen.  It's whether I put in a good fight or not.  And last but not least, it's whether I come to Christ with my problems and my weaknesses and find enough trust to reach out to him and to open my heart to the love, the endless possibilities, the hope and the joy.  And the way the world is today, afflictions are a pretty big test.  One we need to study for every day, because we get "quizzed" every day.  And prayer is our conduit to the master teacher.  With study and prayer - these tests of weaknesses and trials can be tackled, conquered, made into triumphs.  Hundreds of little triumphs over my will.